Many children go through stages of separation anxiety. Children who have lost family before [through court order, tragedy, adoption, whatever] are particularly prone to long struggles with any kind of separation.
She gets so worried when I leave. It sometimes seems as if she wants to Velcro herself to me. I don't leave the house that often. Much less leave it for long. But I do need to buy groceries and she can't always come to every doctor and dentist appointment. She just can;t trust that she can count on me being there. I don't think she still worries about me deliberately leaving her. I think she knows and truly believes that I won't, despite the Velcro attacks. But now she worries about everything else. Will I be hit by a car? Will I get sick? Will there be a bank robbery while I'm making a deposit? Will my plane crash? Quiet her fears, God. Help her see the world as full of opportunities, not full of threats. Help her feel safe. Help her learn that not everyone who loves her will leave her or be taken away.
Excerpted from "The Caring Heart Speaks: Meditations for foster, kinship, and adoptive parents" by Gail Underwood Parker. Artwork by Anna Parker David from the book cover.