Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
This book generally gets [and deserves] good reviews and I know many adoptive parents who have found the book helpful. However, in this conversation it came out that some parents find it discouraging. The book is full of the fears and concerns experienced by adopted children and in the process includes many ways that parents unintentionally may make things more difficult or send unintended messages. One person I talked to said it almost dsicouraged them from choosing to adopt a child they had been considering, for fear they would not be able to make the child happy. NOT what the author intended!
Sadly, far less well known is Sherrie Eldridge's wonderful second book:
20 Things Adoptive Parents Need to Succeed..Discover the Unique Need of Your Adopted Child and Beocme the Best Parent You Can
THIS book is far more PROactive than reactive. In it Eldridge focuses on the parents and provides lots of practical ideas for success. This book is far more encouraging AND far more useful.
While it focuses on adoptive children, I recommend it to foster parents and kinship parents as well. ANYone who is attempting to raise children not born to them can learn specific ideas to help their challenges in this second book.
Spread the word. Get a copy. Give it to a friend who is adopting. Give one to your local library or association. Give it to a social worker or your child welfare department. Write the author with your feedback. Best of all... write the publisher!! As a published writer myself I know how hard it is to get publishers interested in a book proposal, especially one that is targeted to a minority market. THANK the publisher for recognizing this segment of the parenting market. Thank them for the positive rather than exploitive nature of this book. Ask them for more books for this market!
And if you know someone who is considering this special kind of parenting......
Reach out....Share your successes. Share your expertise. Share your stories!
Image credits and thanks to: lsmnj.org,